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“I will be thinking about this book for a long time.”
–Sally Hepworth, author of Darling Girls

The shocking, unforgettable novel that Junot Daz called “searingly brilliant,” now with an exclusive bonus chapter, enhanced discussion guide, and a conversation with the author, Ava Dellaira.

GRIEF IS LIKE THIS . . .

Falling in love with your best friend, only to lose her to a mysterious death.

Working for decades to achieve a dream, and just when it’s within reach, watching it threaten to go up in flames.

Rushing home to the city you fled years ago to witness your father’s last breaths.

Spending the first sleepless months in the throes of new motherhood alone, as your husband struggles to save his career.

Befriending the woman who should be your enemy, because you are that lonely . . .

Annie, Jesse, Noah, and Juliette are tied together by their experiences of grief; they are separated by their own versions of the truth of what happened on a single night twelve years ago, when Juliette, a college freshman grieving her mother, and Noah, a high school senior fighting for a place in a world that told him he didn’t matter, found each other. Spanning decades, this complex, captivating story pulls back the curtains of cancel culture to explore ambition, empathy, art, desire, consent, motherhood, and what it really means to lose everything.